DON'T DRINK THE WATER

LOOK, I’M WOODY. HOWDY, HOWDY, HOWDY.

Starring Woody Allen

Adorable Alternative Version

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An incredible bucket of crap. Let’s look at how many Sopranos actors have appeared in Allen films:

Edie Falco (Carmela)

– Bullets Over Broadway

The boss’ put upon wife gets an even shorter stick by being deprived of any lines. Shut up, possible greatest actress of her generation!

Tony Sirico (Paulie)

– Celebrity, Deconstructing Harry, Everyone Says I LoveYou, Mighty Aphrodite, Bullets Over Broadway

Psycho for hire plays a load of hoods, world keeps turning.

Aida Turturo (Janice)

– Celebrity, Manhattan Murder Mystery

In Celebrity she’s a fortune teller!

John Ventimiglia (Artie Bucco)

– Bullets Over Broadway

Seeing the mild-mannered chef play a mobster is liable to make your head pop open and spurt your brains all over the screen. It’s not supposed to be this way!

Arthur J. Nascarella (Some Guy)

– The Curse of the Jade Scorpion

Who?

Matt Servitto (Agent Harris)

– Melinda and Melinda

Perhaps he should launch an investigation into how the movie ended up so bad. Because he played an FBI agent.

Jerry Adler (Hesh)

– Manhattan Murder Mystery

Murderer! You got away with murder you murdering murderer!

Tony Darrow (Larry Boy Barese)

– Small Time Crooks, Sweet and Lowdown, Celebrity, Deconstructing Harry, Mighty Aphrodite, Bullets Over Broadway,

Nope.

Paul Herman (Beansie)

– Mighty Aphrodite, Bullets Over Broadway, Radio Days, The Purple Rose of Cairo,

Had his legs broken by a psychopath, deserved it for starring in Mighty Aphrodite.

David Margulies (Tony’s Attorney)

– Celebrity

Innocent bystander to the greatest putdown of the 1980s:

Yes, it’s true. This man has no dick.

There's probably more. But Whaddya Gonna Do?