CELEBRITY

LOOK, I’M WOODY. HOWDY, HOWDY, HOWDY.

Starring Kenneth Brannagh

French Trailer Which Somehow Makes The Film Seem Better Than It Is By Being In French

M

Just… odd. Stuffed full of quality actors (Pre-Jowly Dicaprio, Judy Davis, Hank Azaria) but disjointed as a chainsaw accident victim with a mouth full of tacks. Kenneth Brannagh is a nightmare, copying Allen’s shtick action for action and word for word; even Scarlett Johannson did a better job of being Alleny in Scoop, though Brannagh’s never been trumpeted for his subtlety. His performance sucks the film out of the vague reality that Allen usually skirts around, making the film a celebrity stuffed sketch show without the jokes, the one saving grace being the extended segment with Charlize Theron as a no-name nymphomaniac model which is every bit as good as it sounds. Everyone else is underused or ignored or given shoddy material that seems to be left out of his other films, whilst the only entertainment comes from spotting gestating actors in a pre-fame indie test-tube (Sam Rockwell, that odd-looking man from Entourage, J. Jonah Jameson). And that’s not a film. That’s a catalogue for casting directors, and too superficial for words, so these ones had better stop now. These words, here. They’re done.